Catharsis

My mom has lots of advice for me. But I think one of the biggest ideas that has stuck with me is that when you give someone something, you can't have any expectations on how it is used. You give because you want to give, not because you want to control the gift.

I've been thinking about giving a lot lately. Will and I try to give a lot of ourselves. We don't always have lots of money leftover to give to charities, so we try our best to give of the things we do have, like our time and our resources. We give for lots of reasons. We give to model to our children the value of helping others. We give because we value the people around us and we care about them. We give because we know in our hearts it is the right thing to do.

But I have to admit, sometimes it's really hard not to expect something back. Not something huge, of course, but a thank you card might be nice. An invite over to dinner. A phone call. Anything to acknowledge that we sacrificed a piece of our lives to help another out. But that's exactly the problem. When we help someone, even with something very very big, we do so because we want to, not because we expect something in return. And I can't stew and fuss over gratitude that was or wasn't shown, because that's not why we gave in the first place. I need to take a deep breath and remember that giving is unconditional and that I want my children to learn to give of themselves because they have the abilities and resources to do so, not because they want something in return.

Giving is something we do because, in our hearts, we believe that we are making our community and our world better with every little action we take.

And that's all I have to say about that.